Posted by Trudy on 11/6/2006, 12:08 am
209.90.128.10
Saturday I said good-bye to my furr-baby, Carly. My 9 yr old Black Lad stricken with Cancer. Putting her down was the hardest thing I ever have done and my heart is breaking. She was my shadow, my best friend and my baby - and the pain hurts to the point I feel I can't even breath. At the beginning of summer, I also lost my Yorkie, Charm, in a tragic accident, and having lost both of my 'girl posse' in less then 5 months, seems so hard on my heart I just don't know what to do. When I think the tears are over and there are none left... there comes so many more. I often joked with friends that I wanted more children but instead I had pets - but truly they were my children and loosing them is killing me inside, especially the loss of Carly. She was truly special and I loved her with all my heart.
But what has added insult to injury, is the lack of support I have recieved from my husband. Carly passed at 11am on Saturday, and at dinner that day, I stated lovingly that I was very uncomfortable with everyone's silence that I would really like to talk about what happened. The first thing out of my husband's face was 'how much did it cost' - when I told him - he blasted saying - 'for just one needle' ... I reassured him it was for cremation too but somehow I feel I was the one that needed reassuring that everything was going to be ok and how wonderful a dog Carly truly was and that he was sorry for my loss.
How do I deal with the loss of my beloved Carly and also knowing that I live with someone who can't emotionally support me at my time of need. I feel so alone and hurt.
Looking for luv & support, T
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